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When i was a teenager, i was about to go on a long boat ride on one of our exclusive ferries or whatever its called. (we call it Hurtigruta). Sadly i get easily seasick when i haven't been on a boat for a while.
Before the boat even left the docks i was starting to feel a little queasy. I also hadn't eaten for a while so i went to the cantina and got myself a plain hamburger with fries. I forgot to get anything to drink and wasn't gonna be arsed to get up to get something.
By the time I was finished devouring my meal, the boat was on its way, I got up, and instantly almost fell over due to being dizzy. Fuck, im going to have to barf, i muttered to myself. That burger tasted like shit by the way....Dry, stale, no salad, spices or sauce or anything.
So I stumbled my way towards the nearest bathroom, literally bouncing off the walls, trying to keep my balance. Scaring the shit out of the people i passed, i must have appeared like a drunken mad bull, about to trample them.
Wow it almost feels like the room is swaying right now just thinking back on this...
I made it to the bathroom, i was hoping to barf in the sink, but i couldn't even stand upright, so i was going to have to get on the floor and shove my face down in that filthy toilet.
I got down on my knees, grabbed the toilets handicap handles with all my might so i wouldn't fall over, yes i was that dizzy.
And then i barfed...or at least attempted to. Because i didn't drink anything and my stomach was empty before eating, my dinner came up as a solid log, stuck in my throat, it wouldn't come out. Stuck in my throat, i kept coughing and re-barfing, slowly pushing that fat sausage up my throat.
It felt like i was going to choke and die, i figured, this is it, im going to be found dead here on a public bathroom floor, with a huge vomit-poop sticking out of my mouth.
Finally the thing started to come out, i could see it hanging out of my mouth, while it was still partially stuck in my throat, a yellow brownish mass with bits of un-chewed burger meat and fries pieces in it.
As a final insult, it plopped down into the water, splashing delicious toilet nectar in my face.
and that's the story of how Barret lived to barf another day.